My transition from a free man to property is still ongoing. It started over 4 years ago, in some ways it seems like it has always been like this, in others, it feels like the past was someone else's life.
When I look back at the 'other' life I realise just how much everything has changed. Transition ? No, more like a war followed by rebirth. It has been anything but easy, I have struggled so much. Sometimes I wonder how MT has stayed in there as well as how I have remained her property. But we have, and that speaks volumes.
These are a list of some of the things I struggled with (some I still do)
1. Losing autonomy - I spent most of my life making my own decisions, creating my own destiny and in general, doing whatever I wanted. It would take a lifetime to record the chaos this caused, the world is safer now someone else is in control of me.
2. Promiscuity - Being limited to one woman. Most of my life was spent chasing around getting laid as many times as possible. It was possibly an addiction. Ok, I had a lot of fun and a lot of variety but it did not fulfil me. Now there is one woman and that one is more than enough for me. Hell, she'd be more than enough for the Red Army.
3. Spending Limitations - God I hated this one (I still dislike it) . I used to spend as and when I wanted, even when I did not actually have the money. On a whim I once brought a house without using a single penny of my own money. It cost £90,000 (which was a lot at the time especially as I had mortgages on two other properties as well).
4. Clothes - Not having the freedom to dress as I please or buy the clothes I want.Actually, this has transpired to be a good thing as MT makes me look much better than I would.Who knew money couldn't buy style?
5. Having to ask for things - Grrrrr this is a big one. Things such as - orgasms, sweets, junk foods, chocolate, alcohol, motor bike rides, TV , permission to go out etc etc .
6. Dominance - another big one. I have always been the one in charge and exerting my dominance on others. In my career, at one stage I was responsible for 26 establishments with a staff of over 1200 people. Now I am not even allowed to be in charge of me. Where did I go wrong?
7. Having to be nicer to people - I have little/no tolerance of people who piss me off. Ok, I admit I am one of the most least tolerant of people. It does not take much for some people to hack me off, in fact all some have to do is continue breathing. Joking aside, if someone does something I do not like I will go out of my way to a) let them know it and b) try to get retribution. MT dislikes this (unless she thinks it is warranted but then it has to be a really big thing).As a consequence, I am banned from hitting anyone or being offensive to them, unless MT decides to loosen leash.
8. Being used as a sex object - Due to items 2) and 6) above, this has been not only difficult but also bloody humiliating. Being used like this for me Owner has been bad enough but having to provide sexual services to men just for her entertainment, well that's just too much. I cannot tell you how much I hate this.
9. The names - Oh there have been so many, here are a few ; boy, kitten, bitch, cunt, dildo, baby-cakes, slut, slag, cupcake, muffin (note the baked goods fetish) piggy, pixie, pixie cat ? (WTF is a 'pixie cat'??? And why am I one)?
10. Not being able to stop her from stealing and losing my bloody socks. People have been hanged for less.
Those are the main ones, there are hundreds of other things, over time I am sure these will become apparent in other posts.
