Sex, Xmas and Decorations

Last night I was permitted to pleasure MT in bed, I still get amazed at how much I really enjoy this, especially as I have been doing if for over 5 years now. I find it sexy and submissive. I was not permitted an orgasm, but I did not mind, it was just really hot making her come over and over again.

Today has been a gentle one, a walk in the forest, a little bit of tidying our garden and the rest sitting around. I was allowed to watch some TT race footage which was nice. There was also the dreaded trip up into our loft to get the Xmas decorations down.

MT is currently in the process of decorating the tree. She makes and excellent job of it as well, the tree always looks amazing. It is the same tree we have had for 4 years, that MT bought when we moved in together. Getting it in and out of the house is tricky. I have never had an xmas tree wth roots before but MT is quite insistent that this is essential. It is not very high but quite wide at the base and when I pick it up I get spiked.

Somehow pain seems to follow me around. It makes a change for the pain not to have been caused by MT.

MT's 'understated' tree.

Good slave service

Today has been a good day, a busy day, but worthwhile.

Yesterday I only worked for two hours so I did not feel as tired as I usually do, or as achey. MT has wanted some jobs done for a while and today was the day. I thought this would be prudent on numerous levels, including the chilli ;) but the main reason was that I wanted to show her my positive attributes which have been a bit in hiding recently.

I took down and moved some shelving in the bedroom as per her requirement. Made good the holes and repainted the whole wall. Cleaned and polished the shelves and ornaments. Fitted MT's pine mirror to the wall and my gothic style mirror. Swept and washed the floor and tidied up the room generally.

I then went and did the supermarket shop with MT, and later made her chick pea curry for dinner which is one of her favourite meals. I also found the the Downton Abbey episode on the internet she wanted to watch and we watched that together.

I was allowed a bike ride which was great. It was a more subdued ride today as earlier on I had watched the Moto GP race on television and unfortunately Marco Simoncelli was fatally injured in a crash. It was a horrific crash and  made a chill run through me. So it was a case of taking it extra easy.

MT told me that she was very pleased with me today, which was really great to hear. See I can be good ;)

PS.  Had fucking awesome sex last night.

A busy day

Work was busy busy today and I felt totally zonked when I got in after 5 hours of solid gardening very early in the day.

I started a low carb diet on Tuesday, for someone like me who loves their carbs it is quite a difficult thing for me to do. But, it is effective, it is something MT uses and at least I have the luxury of being allowed to eat lots of  meat. MT has also made me these cheesecake mousses which are far too delicious to belong on a diet, so that livens things up.

So far I have lost three and a half pounds which is encouraging over 5 days. MT wants me to lose some of my chubby bits and to tone up some more. So my diet will continue for as long as she determines, best I try very very hard then.

After being a bit gobby to MT (What me?!) I was given a little reminder regarding my place this afternoon. The little reminder was about 7 inches long, thick and is attached to a harness which in turn was attached to a miffed MT. As one can imagine, this did not bode well for a mouthy slave.

Fortunately I did get lube, which was quite surprising really but I was very grateful for it. It has been a while since I have been used like this and I quickly remembered 'my place'. I think actually it was mostly about grounding me and 'bringing me back to her' after the last few days as well.

After MT had achieved her usually high number of orgasms I was left bruised, battered and bleeding, so situation normal.

This type of use it tends to interfere with my ability to get an erection, but, today was one of the rarer times when I was up and ready. MT demanded I put her cock to good use and I did not need to be told twice. I am always up for a game of hide the sausage.

Having being given such a treat (and being allowed an orgasm which I hadn't expected) I was given TV football as well. I like being MT's slave, well, most of the time :)

She went shopping

Last night was relatively quiet. We watched a pay per view movie (Machete which MT delighted in due to the hot Latino chicks and lots of violent gore), and then we went to bed. When MT places my hand in a certain place there are no need for words. I love pleasuring her like this, it is something I have grown to love so much that it feels wrong if I am not doing it. Making her orgasm is hot, very hot and if I am lucky I get to orgasm as well. Unfortunately, last night was not one of those times and after MT fell asleep, I was left stiff but it did not matter, MT was satisfied and that makes me smile.

Today we went shopping in Bury St Edmunds and I took MT to lunch. Prior to this we had been to a DIY store as I needed to get some stuff for us and my customers. I was quite concerned when I saw what MT had in her hand. It was a set of craft knives, MT made no comments about them at all. I felt that certain feeling I guess most slaves feel when they see their owners with things in their hands that they may or may not use to inflict pain on their slaves. Of course, it may be innocent, but MT does love to cut me and drink my blood. At the moment I will just put it to the back of my mind.

To be honest, there is nothing I can do about it anyway, if she decides to use them on me that is what will happen. Being a slave is so hard in so many ways, but conversely a slave does not have to worry about many decision making matters, the decisions are made for us... for better or worse.

I left MT alone for a short while to go to the toilet, when we met up (it had only been 5 minutes) she had a little bag in her hand. 'I have a present for you' she said 'and something for myself as well' She opened the bag to reveal three pairs of  panties. A turquoise pair, cream lace ones and a peach lace pair, 'the peach ones are yours' she said with a beaming smile. I really just do not want to talk about them or think about them now. Groan.

Used

Last night I was pleasuring MT in bed when she told me to lay on my back as she wanted to use her 'dildo', this is the way she sees my cock, as her dildo, just something to use to give her pleasure.

MT then got on top and rode me. Of course as always I was ecstatic to be used like this. Then MT started to slap my face. At first the slaps were quite gentle, almost playful and then the stinging ones started.

MT came several times and I struggled hard not to orgasm as I did not have permission. The slapping of my face made it more difficult not to orgasm as the humiliation of being used sexually and slapped at the same time hit my triggers. At one point MT gripped me by the throat and applied pressure. She loves to do this and I know she has to use a lot of self control as she would love to temporarily cut off my air supply till I lost consciousness (well she does say it would only be temporary :) ).

I then received the hardest slap she has ever given me around the face, it stung so much and the force rocked my head to one side. At the same time she had a massive orgasm. How I never came at that precise moment I will never know. MT said that I had been very lucky as she had really wanted to hit me really hard around the face, but as it was dark in the room she did not want to use that much force without being sure she was on target, see what a considerate owner she is?

MT said' good boy' and rolled off me. She then toyed with my dildo before dropping off to sleep. I lay there wide awake, no orgasm, a still very stiff cock and a stinging cheek.

Round two then occurred this afternoon. She's clearly starting to get better. After torturing me for ages I was even allowed an orgasm this time :D

Oh What A Night..

OMG.

Last week I thought my 'service provision' to MT had attained a level that may never be surpassed. I was proud, very proud in fact, it had been one of the best ever and had been of monumental duration. Yes, the slave walked with a swagger for several days with a big smile on his face. My only concern was that everything after that could seem somewhat inadequate and this was worrying. The next few 'service performances', although deemed satisfactory were of a significantly more normal standard. I knew MT did not expect such performances on a regular basis as these things just happen once in a while but I wanted to provide this again for MT

I am pleased, no I am fucking delighted, to say that last night the slave not only met the previous standard but significantly exceeded it. So much so, that for the first time ever MT actually seemed fully sated....and that is a first. I dont like to boast, but I was fucking awesome (and MT wasn't bad either). Now I feel under even more self imposed pressure because I may never be able to repeat that, or can I ? I decided to offer morning service as well, which was quite special too. Being 55 is not so bad after all, roll on 60.

Making MT's breakfast of poached eggs and toast was achieved with a self satisfied grin and more than just a little cockiness, excuse the deliberate pun. The slave is walking tall, but ever conscious of the fact that pride often comes before a fall, or should that be before a fool ?

I thus felt fairly confident that my request to take Cati out for a ride would be approved. Luckily I was allowed and Cati and I had a little ride, sorry the rest is personal :) Decorum demands that what goes on with Cati is private, unless MT asks me of course.

I even managed to do some work on our garden today, which has been sadly neglected in the last six months. Damn it is a mess, a very poor advert for the gardening side of our business. We had to start from scratch with the garden when we moved here three years ago, there was not really a garden, just a bloody great concrete mess. So it is a fairly new garden but is slowly starting to look a bit more established. It is totally overstocked as my customers are always giving me plants and shrubs and I hate saying no, and then I just can't throw them out, so I plant them. It is getting very very crowded now, but each plant has its own merits and I just cant bring myself to murder any of them, so it will stay looking overcrowded.

(I wrote this because apparently MT said on FL that I was 'low swagger'. I am just so fucking funny)

Sleepless in Suffolk.

There are many things I have found difficult about being property, I have at my worst moments wondered if I am actually the slave equivalent of the antiChrist. As time has passed, I have improved, well MT made me so I had no choice. I am still a work in progress but I do think (and more importantly so does MT) that I have made significant advances in recent weeks. I am just hoping that there will not be a any regression, hoping as much for my sake as well as MT's, as I know she will move swiftly against any negative changes.

Recently I have tried analyzing why I sometimes struggle so much, seemingly from nowhere. The inherent issue of not liking being told what to do I have sort of reconciled... ok a bit ;) I have noticed a fairly consistent pattern, I am usually at my worst when I am tired. The more I have thought about this the more sure I am. Like many people, when tired I have less tolerance and just usually want to chill out or sleep. If I can't do either I get stressed, when stressed I am often  a real nightmare, and then my world implodes and I start to make those around me very unhappy.

Bedtime can be a busy time when one is the slave of a woman such as MT. The desire to sleep often overrides my desire to serve, of course I serve, that is my function. I often serve until 1-00 am and then get to sleep shortly after, then at 7-30 ish I get up and go to work. The night is peppered with generally being unable to sleep, pain and numbness in limbs, toilet trips etc, so I end up tired. The next day is busy with work and then the cycle continues, usually a downwards spiral as I get more and more tired. This then becomes more and more of a problem and an eruption is only a matter of time. Then it is 'hang head in shame and apologise time'.

So, having discovered this, I am experimenting with going to bed earlier, so I can serve and get to sleep a bit earlier. At the moment, it seems to be an improvement, I am getting less tired and subsequently less stressed and have not kicked off in a while....Result.

This week is a busy one, I am working tomorrow (Saturday) which is a bit of a downer, but Sunday and Monday are non work days, well non work apart from whatever MT gives me. She is generally very receptive to my pleas of 'please, I need a rest',  well most of the time... unless there is a pressing orgasm or ten to have of course, in which case its business as normal.

Cati, I'm sorry baby.

Last night I ate some reduce priced plaice from the supermarket which drastically upset my stomach, this continued through the night and for most of today. So I am not feeling quite my best. Now, I am assuming it was the plaice and not some dastardly deed by my owner in recompense for my attempted 'slave union rebellion'. She would not do that, would she??? Hmmm she probably would actually, but I think not on this occasion. Why? Because she would have taken great delight in telling me it was her.

Being a devout slave to my owner, like any good martyr, I soldiered on and went to work to earn 'coin'. Never has a days work been so gladly completed as it was today. So I am very glad to be home and no work for three days, well, apart from providing service for She Who Must Be Obeyed. (Written in invisible slave ink) You know, the bossy bitch.

I like to consider myself reasonably brave (as well as stupid). After my failed rebellion, predominantly due to the appalling, low down, insensitive threats to Cati, I decided to push my bravery to the outer limits.  Now as many will know, this is Cati 2, Cati 1 was cruelly sold by you know who . Being allowed to have Cati 2 was extremely lucky (and she made me wait over a year), so I was pushing this further recently by asking for some spare parts. Again I was fortunate, I was permitted to buy a brand new fairing panel from the proceeds of my Xmas tips. So today, after the failed 'coup', I asked MT if I could bid on Ebay for yet another fairing panel.....see my bravery has no limits.

If I said 'MT was not happy', or 'MT appeared to be slightly miffed' or 'MT gave me That Look', or 'MT politely said no', you would probably be quite suprised. You all know how reasonable she can be, how gentle and mild, how sweet and forgiving... Yep you guessed it she looked really pissed off with me.

PS This morning, despite being close to death (just love being melodramatic, well I am a man) I tried to provide my manly services to MT as demanded (being ever efficient she had set her alarm extra early). All did not go as well as usual, so on my return home, despite still feeling close to death I made brave and vigorous amends for this morning. One happy owner and one very happy me, and it may mean I am allowed to get to sleep before 1-00 am. Ok that bit is stupidly optimistic.

(Is it my fault I clearly have Thracian blood in my veins? Perhaps that's why she seems to like the damned stuff so much)

Sex

MT has a massive sex drive, probably higher than a roomful of teenage boys watching porn. Trying to keep up is almost if not actually impossible but it's good fun trying to and I live to serve. Yesterday morning I was given the onerous task of providing her with a marathon of sexual services. 'You poor thing' I hear you say. It's tough being a male slave, but someone's got to do it and it might as well be me. So, I spent the best part of the day doing my animal manly bit, and no stone was left unturned.

As things subsided, I could see my efforts had been appreciated, so when bedtime approached I felt a sense of ease and safety. Alas, once again I had failed to read the situation accurately. As I entered the bedroom she smiled sweetly at me and I smiled back, then she uttered the immortal but dreaded words ' fetch me the strap on '. I smiled, the type of smile you make when you know all is lost but you don't want to show it. So being the obedient slave that I am I of course complied.

There was much relief when it was over, unfortunately, at 7am I was unceremoniously put to use again. I was too tired and too sore but that's not really relevant when you are a slave (though it did mean I missed getting to the gym which made me stroppy).

I still find being on the receiving end of this painful and totally humiliating act very difficult, although it has been happening very regularly over the last four years. I do not enjoy it, if I did it would probably not happen.

There have been a few occasions when the feeling has not been unpleasant and in a strange sort of way I do occasionally miss it when it has not occurred for a short while. Perhaps I miss the humiliation, which since becoming hers is something I now find strangely addictive.

MT is a voracious lover, with a huge appetite and none more so than when she is utilising a bottom.She shows little mercy (apart from any injury) and pursues one orgasm after the other until she is sated. This often leaves me totally exhausted and more than a tad 'uncomfortable'.

Early on in our relationship, after I had made a negative comment about such usage she told me that to not be sore was a privilege and proceeded to give me a lesson to that effect. I was used every day, sometimes several times a day for a whole month. Although the use was limited to one month, the recovery period was an additional six weeks, the lesson was learned and I have never repeated the mistake.

Postscript; Did I forget mention that my right buttock appears to be bleeding rather a lot. I must have slipped on something sharp.