Distress and Limits

On the O/p group there is a thread titled ' Hands Off My Owner'. This started out discussing slaves attitudes to their owners having other liaisons. The thread has progressed into a discussion on psychological distress and limits in O/p. 

I thought it might be worthwhile to share my post on the thread here for those that do not view the O/p Group threads -

I have been following this thread with interest.

On a personal note, I do sincerely believe that being in an O/p relationship is often very difficult, much more so than many other types of relationship dynamics. As a consequence, it is something that should not be entered into lightly and requires certain strengths and traits of character if it is to be successful.

Being a slave and being allowed to be 'yourself' and not to have any control exerted over you or very little control exerted over you and/or being allowed to have limits facilitates a smoother life perhaps than the opposite scenario eg a heavily controlled dynamic which continuously evolves and where the only limits are those the Owner wishes to maintain.

In my personal opinion, an O/p relationship can not have limits imposed by the property.

My first wife tried to stab me on numerous occasions, she had numerous affairs behind my back and also knocked me unconscious with a hame on one occasion.

My second wife got pregnant by another man who she had being having an affair with for six years. Of course I was unaware of this at the time and only found out my 'daughter' was not my daughter when the affair was discovered by his partner and she informed me.

My two ex wives did actually cause me 'damage' for a variety of reasons, physically and psychologically. One of the most significant elements of this damage was the betrayal of trust and all of the deceptions. The fact it was all done behind my back, no regard for my feelings, emotions or any respect for me.

There have been many other instances of 'damage' , in fact I believe everyone has 'baggage' it is part of life.

I knew I had baggage when I met MT, I knew I had all sorts of hang ups and I knew that if I entered into an O/p relationship with MT there would be changes and that it was more than likely I would have to deal with some things I would find extremely difficult, perhaps even impossible. In my head, there were things I considered that would be impossible for me to deal with.

Having spent a huge amount of my life doing difficult things, career wise and in my personal life, I did not feel the disadvantages outweighed the advantages of becoming property and thus I signed up for a life with me not having limits.

When it was easy stuff to achieve it was of course easy to attain what MT wanted. When it became difficult, well that was a totally different story, much of which has been documented on the internet in one format or other.

MT is rather smart, huge understatement, she knew every detail about my past, my baggage my 'damage' for want of a better word. So when the issue of her having sexual relations with other males came up she knew how big this was. To say I was unhappy about it would of course be an understatement. BUT there was a huge, no, massive difference, it was up front, out in the open....it was honest and transparent and NOT deception.

I still did not like it, but a lot of time and a lot of work was put in by MT to facilitate the outcome she wanted, the primary issue really was not actually her mad burning desire to have sex with other men. It was about her ownership of me, my total submission to her and acceptance of actually truly being property and accepting no limits does actually just mean that in practice as well as theory.

When I was having my issues, I had to remind myself why I had given myself to her. The fact she is intelligent, loving, caring, a good person, trustworthy, honest and reliable etc etc.

MT was not either of my two previous wives, she had not damaged me, I had no reason to not trust her. All the other changes she had made had been positive ones and we had grown closer and closer and were still evolving our O/p relationship.

I am no more fucked up than many other people. In many ways experiencing and surviving the many adverse things I have experienced has perhaps made me stronger and stood me in good stead to deal with life.

MT is as sane as anyone else, she is also very competent. Yes she is a sadist but there are far worst things in life to be than that, she also happens to be honest and I admire that.

I wanted to be owned by MT, I wanted to be in this relationship with her, I willingly and knowingly gave up my rights to anything, I did that because firstly I trusted her in every regard and secondly, but equally as importantly, because I thought I was strong and tough enough mentally and physically to withstand a relationship where I would be tested, developed and above all, where I belonged.